The Land of Promises

I visited the Terror Háza (House of Terror) museum first time last week. I was very impressed. From Paris to New York and Washington DC I've been in the best museums in the world, but this Hungarian institution, which is dedicated to preserve the memories of the times of Nazi and Bolshevik terror is better than any museum I have ever been. Great design by Attila F. Kovacs, superbly organised display rooms, intelligent presentations reconstruct the consecutive evils which fundamentally shaped Hungarian mentality in the 20th Century and have a profound effect on the minds of the present generations too. I've been invited to the museum to give a first hand account of my personal experiences during the 1960-70s, for their Oral History archives. Before talking to the video camera I had an opportunity to meet with the director of the museum, Maria Schmidt. I gave her my 'Theremin' book and proposed to make an interactive, multimedia show in the museum, which would detail the life and times of Professor Theremin, the inventor of the world's first space controlled electronic music instrument - and as of most of the bugging devices surrently still in use. The theme would perfectly fit to the goals and style to the museum. Ms. Schmidt was in a hurry, but promised me that she will look into the matter and will notify me of her decision. .................... I decided on the theme of my next WordCitizen show, on May 2, at the Merlin International Theatre. I will dedicate the evening to the culture, psychology, metaphysics and art of lying, which is the most decisive feature of present day Hungarian life. As usual I will start the show with a video piece, created especially for the occasion, then I will proceed talking freely about my personal experiences with the subject, trying to give an accurate diagnosys and methods of therapy. ..................... I called Mr. László Moldován, owner of Katalizator Publishers. I have learned that in spite of poromising me the opposite, he did not apply for a publishing grant for my 'Caribbean Book'. I wish he had notify me of his decision before the application deadline has passed, giving me an opportunity to find an other publisher for the book. It seems that it does not make much sense to collaborate with Mr. Moldován in the future, for he is now proven to be unreliable. He is the 8th publisher who promised me the publication of the book, but - after much deliberation and lying - did not deliver. ..................... Mr. Gábor Pados, the would be publisher of the 'Yippie!' book called. He was freaking out, screaming and yelling, because I put the ongoing saga of the book - including his unfulfilled promises - on the Net, in my Hungarian language blog. I do not want to fight with him, so I deleted the incriminating page, which did not calm him a bit. He promised the publication of the book again, but gave no deadline. ........................... I had a high school reunion last night, meeting with the fellows I graduated with from the St. István high school, in 1964. I felt like partying in a mass grave.

Tibet Night

The 'My Tibet' show ended a few hours ago. More people came than last time. They were an inspiring audience. I did not know most of those who came, which is good, I guess. Yet I must think my marketing strategies over: I have sent out about 800 invites by e-mail, yet no more than 4-5 people came as a result of that. Most of the audience came because they have heard the interviews I gave previously to Hungarian Public Radio and Club Radio. It would be a great help to get tv interviews or announcements, but they (and the mainstream printed media) are interested in me usually only when some of my contemporaries dies and they need an eulogy. Several of those who asked me to set aside free tickets for them did not show up. I must revise my free ticket policies also. ............ After presenting my new 'Free Tibet' video I talked for about 90 minutes. I outlined my over half a century long fascination with Tibet. I talked about her history, religions and culture. As footnotes to the main theme I also talked about the writers Ervin Baktay (the author of several Tibet related books) and Béla Hamvas, who introduced the Eastern cultures, religions, philosophies and histories, and as a direct result of his great educational work he was banned in Hungary during the bolshevik dictatorship. Their books introduced the great spiritual schools of the East to me. Briefly I also talked about the American civil rights movements in the 1960-70s, and about Thoreau's concept of civil disobedience. When I finished my part I turned to the audience for questions and comments. They were sitting in the dark, I couldn't see the faces. One gentleman lectured me on historical dates and other matters, in a rather humorless, dry, military manner. "Buddhism does not originate from Buddha", he thundered facelessly, from behind the dark rows of people. He sounded like someone straight out of a military academy. I asked for his name, but he wouldn't give it out. Another gentleman spoke on such a low volume that I hardly could hear what he has said. Whenever I did manage to gasp the meaning of his whispered words and tried to answer his questions, the humorless soldier interrupted me and answered them himself with stereotypes. .......... After the end of the show the people left. I packed up my gear and went home. It would have been great to unwind a bit, in the company of friends after the the show, like we did in the past, but these are different times. The art of conversation is long gone globally. People do not enjoy each other's company anymore. Instead of exchanging information and ideas they deliver monologues, if they talk at all. I must keep on changing with the times too, should give up my remaining pathetic yearnings for soul mates. ............ I was hoping that Mr. Zsolt Prieger would attend the show, just as he has promised me just a few days ago, so we could discuss the fate of the 'Karl-Heinz Koala' audio book, which is floating in the air for over 6 months now. Mr. Prieger did not come. I have learned from someone who knows him that he is in Roumania right now, playing a gig in the city of Marosvásárhely. Surely he knew at the time of our last communication that he will not be in town last night. I do not have any idea why he needs to act so deceivingly. From the second hand news I am getting about him it appears that he is in another self destructive period of his life. Does he have any self-respect left?. ............. "Forward with Jah Orthodox". I must complete my essays on soul,- funk- and punk music, for Mr. Géczi's book by the weeked. I have already did some research on the first two themes. Tomorrow I will start to collect data on punk.

FREE TIBET

I was supposed to have 3 visitors over the weekend, young people with which I am presently collaborating on projects. None of them showed up or called. This total lack of civility is so typically Hungarian. They talk and promise a lot, but their words mean absolutely nothing. Slave mentality rules here. Hungarians in general lost their self-respect long time ago and this ethical disability is in their genes now............. My co-workers did not come or call, but almost two months after we were supposed to sign the ‘Karl-Heinz Koala’ audio book’s publishing contract with the on-line publishers Mr. Zsolt Prieger called, as if nothing has happened. Last time I have heard from him was at the beginning of February (see ‘Karl-Heinz Koala’ blog). He has no time right now but he will contact me soon, he wrote me then. He has forgotten his promise, he says now, without bothering to apologize. Anyway, he is keen on publishing the audio book now, which I started to redo with other musicians since. We shall meet soon, he urged me on the phone, but right after saying so, he stated as usual that he is incredibly busy. It means that it could take months again to organize a half an hour long meeting with Mr. Prieger. These people are always so damn busy, like some household servants at the court of King Richard the 3^rd, yet they do so precious little. We started the 'Karl-Heinz Koala' project with Mr. Prieger & Co. exactly one year ago, yet it is still not completed, in terms of getting it to the on-line publishers. If I would have worked on it alone, it could have been done in two months flat………… Mr. László Moldován, owner of Katalizator Publishers called last week. We did not get the long awaited publishing grant from the Hungarian Book Foundation, without which he cannot possibly publish my ‘Caribbean Book’, he said. Now he wants to apply for a grant to the National Cultural Foundation. Based on my past experiences with this government controlled organization I am not too optimistic about our chances of getting a grant………… I have completed my 30 minutes long ‘FREE TIBET’ video, with which I will open my ‘My Tibet’ show at the Merlin International Theatre tomorrow (April 3) night. The piece was inspired by the great book 'The Rose of Tibet', by Lionel Davidson (Gollanz, Great Britain, 1962). The book was indirectly recommended to me by David Bowie. Back in 1983, while I was living in Toronto, Canada I have read an interview with Mr. Bowie in the Vogue magazine. One of the photos which accompanied the interview they showed his New York hotel room. On the photo 'The Rose of Tibet' book was laying on his night table. I have always trusted Mr. Bowie's taste and guideance. He has never cheated or disappointed me. With great difficulty I managed to locate the book in the Coles The Book People bookstore, on Yonge street and promptly stole it, along with a small Bible (King James version). For the coming months I read and re-read 'The Rose of Tibet' many times over. Along with Abbie Hoffman's 'Steal This Book' and the works of Louis Ferdinand Céline it became one of my all times favourites. With research, it took me two weeks to complete the video, the first piece I created with the Adobe Premiere editing program. I have also learned the use of the Cubase sound editing program in the meantime. If I want to get anything done in this country I must do all aspects of the work myself, because people are so unreliable here. Does not matter how noble the cause is it is totally impossible for me to find any reliable collaborators in the 21th Century Hungary. It is not because I usually can't offer much financial rewards for their efforts. It is because the locals are so fucked up. Occasionally I manage to get some funds together, which enables me to pay my collaborators fairly well, yet even then they are not dependable. They change directions with the wind. They do not feel any remorse for screwing me up. Just as they do not respect themselves they are not capable of respecting others.............. Mr. Zoltán Géczi, a long time associate called a few days ago. He wants me to write articles on the history of soul music, funk and punk for a new cafe table book on the history of popular music, which he is presently putting together for a mainstream publishing house. They will pay only pennies for my work, but I had to take up the offer because I am totally broke. Have to complete the articles by the end of this week.................. My eyes are bothering me a lot. My vision often gets blury and my head aches. I haven't had a vacation since 2001 and it shows. I have spent 12-14 hours a day staring at my computer's monitor, on a 7/7 bases in the past 7 years. That is my Tibet.